professor

n: a winner in the game of academic politics. associate ~: an also-ran in the game of academic politics. See also reader.

reader

n: an academic who lacks the distinction to achieve the office of professor or associate professor.

monarchy

n: a system of government in which fools inherit the right to govern from their forebears. constitutional ~: a system of government where the fool who has inherited the right to govern is only the titular head of state and the fool who actually exercises executive power is elected to office.

loyalty

n: a quality much esteemed by kings in their subjects, prime ministers in their cabinets, generals in their troops, professors in their faculties, employers in their employees, political parties in their members, managers in their subordinates, criminals in their accomplices and owners in their dogs. Like obedience, to which it is closely related, loyalty is often praised as a virtue, which it is not, and given preference and preferment over integrity, which is.